SPEAKER_00 0:04

You're listening to the Hanging with the AD podcast, where we break down hot topics in athletic administration and lessons learned through leadership. Now, here are your hosts, Josh Matthews and Don Baker.

SPEAKER_01 0:17

Today we sit down with Britt Lee, the co-founder of Pure Athlete, an organization and podcast that helps youth athletes maximize their potential for success in sports and in life. Their pillared approach focuses on vision, grit, skill, belief, and character, and helps to also guide parents through the youth sports journey to find success both on and off the field. Let's settle in and get to know Mr. Britt Lee.

SPEAKER_03 0:54

Britt, we're so glad to have you joining Dynamic for this episode of Hanging with the AD. We're looking forward to getting to know you a little bit and uh hearing your heart. So thanks for taking time to join us today.

SPEAKER_02 1:04

Man, thanks so much for having me. I'm I'm excited about being here. Athletic directors are a core audience for us and coaches and uh here at Pure Athlete. So, you know, love the opportunity to get to speak with you today.

SPEAKER_03 1:17

Yeah, that's great. Britt mentioned it. He's got it there on his uh shirt. Uh so for our listeners, Britt is the co-host, co-founder of the Pure Athlete Podcast, Pure Athlete website and platform. Uh we have become huge fans of that. And that's why we wanted to have Britt on. We'll also hear from Jeff Francour, who's a part of that um platform as well. So a little bit about Britt that we we learned. Brent's a business guy. He spent his career as a marketing executive dealing with brand messaging and consulting, I believe. Brent is the husband of Kay. They have four adult kids, maybe a couple in college, but we'll consider them adults, I think. Um we will focus today on the passion of Brent and his co-host there at Pure Athlete, which is youth sports. I know they've really uh chasing that right now and helping us understand how to be better in that space. But we'll stop right there and let Brett tell us a little bit more about his journey through the world of athletics. Uh Britt, we like to call it the back of the baseball card bio. So if you could take us take a minute, tell us what the back of Britt Lee's baseball card would look like.

SPEAKER_02 2:23

Well, from a sports, from a sports standpoint, it's pretty short. Uh, you know, I I like like so many people, you know, I played everything growing up and and was a decent athlete, but nothing beyond being a decent athlete, played, played some high school hoops, and but tennis became my my deal. My dad played tennis in college at Georgia Tech. You know, I played, I played, you know, pretty fairly high-level tennis back in the day, which wouldn't be very high level today. Uh, but anyway, so my my journey and my interest and my passion around youth sports uh is kind of birthed out of two things. Number one, I'm just passionate about sports. Look, just like so many of us, I love sports. Uh number two is as my kids came along, and I have four kids, as you mentioned, two two older daughters and and two sons. I have twin boys who are both at UGA and their sports management majors, uh, hoping to go into this world as well. But my my girls were, you know, kind of rec sports uh girls. They they never uh they never had they never were passionate about one sport, but they like to play a whole bunch of different things. And then they also got into musical theater and all that. Uh my boys, on the other hand, were like sports fanatics and still are today, and uh, and and played pretty much everything, did not play football, but played pretty much everything and were really good athletes. And then, you know, about middle school, they started shedding some sports and and continued through middle school. During middle school, they they stopped baseball, then they were playing just basketball and tennis, and um, and if you if you could see me, I'm sitting down right now, but I'm five, nine and a half. Uh, and so they looked at basketball, even though they were pretty good and said, I'm probably not gonna be very tall. And uh, so they ended up they were really good.

SPEAKER_03 4:25

They blame that on you.

SPEAKER_02 4:26

What's that?

SPEAKER_03 4:26

They blame, they blame the uh the the basketball.

SPEAKER_02 4:29

They're gonna blame me all the time.

SPEAKER_03 4:30

There you go. That's good.

SPEAKER_02 4:32

Um as as young boys do, they they tend to blame a lot of things on their dad.

SPEAKER_03 4:38

I've got a nine-year-old. He uh, yeah, that's really um really relevant. I agree with that.

SPEAKER_02 4:44

Yeah, yeah. It's it's mo it's mostly fun. Right.

SPEAKER_01 4:49

Mostly fun. I love that.

SPEAKER_02 4:50

That's right. Um, but they uh they ended up deciding they, you know, they really set a goal for wanting to play, you know, big time D1 tennis, uh, you know, after high school. And so we kind of went for it. And uh we went for it, you know, starting really in in eighth grade, but in ninth grade, they specialized. Uh, once we got to high school, they got through puberty, and we'll talk more about that, I'm sure. But they uh but they specialized and we traveled all over the place and they and they were they were pretty good. Uh but we went through all this all the challenges of youth sports today over the next you know five, six years, and and it is a challenge for parents. Uh, I was a tennis guy, I thought, and really knew tennis well, but the landscape and the environment had changed so much that I was, you know, really all the time looking for information on how do I navigate this journey and then the things they went through with major injuries. And, you know, sports psychologists we pulled in at times and just all kind of stuff. Uh, do I play at school? And you know, my club guy is telling me not to, uh, which again, I'd love to talk about that a little more in a bit. Uh, the the short end of the story is we played at school and it was their best experience they had in tennis. Um, but anyway, one of one of my sons decided at as a you know going into his senior year of high school that he wasn't uh gonna play at a a major school. He probably could have played D1, but he wasn't gonna play at big D one, and that's where he wanted to have his college experience. So he quit. The other one ended up playing at Kennesaw State uh for a year, had surgery on one knee in his senior year of high school, and on the other one right before college. And so after one year, he was done. And um just the injury bug had gotten him. And so again, they're both at UGA now. But again, that's that's how my journey started uh as a parent and trying to navigate this whole thing, and and I just became very passionate about it uh as a result. It I will say this, we we'll talk more about this, but you know, we talk a lot on our show about the issues and the challenges and the problems with youth sports, uh and and I think rightly so, but youth sports were great for us, and we have so many, so many great things that came as a result of us, you know, being really involved in youth sports. And so we we want to we want to promote that big time as well.

SPEAKER_03 7:32

That's great. I I did fail, Don. We failed to add something to the bio there. It's right behind Brit. If you're uh watching on YouTube, you can see it. I think he is an author of the book Parenting the Pure Athlete. Uh, we we failed to give an author credit, so I apologize for that, Britt. But uh we we're gonna talk about the book, but I did notice it as you were uh giving your intro there. That's shoot, I fell I failed to mention that. That's quite an accomplishment. So yeah, that that's really good. And I I think Don and I would agree about youth sports being great for us and making it who it who who we are. Um, as we mentioned, we're gonna have Jeff Francoir on here, and he said the exact same thing, and that that's a common thread across y'all's podcast. So I think that's what we need to focus on here. So, hey, my first question, Brent, uh, you talked about parents' involvement in their child's youth sports experience when you spoke to Casey Cavell, a mutual friend of ours, on his podcast uh recently. I was intrigued by your comments. I was at a baseball game, high school baseball game. I was way out in right field by the light bulbs. I wasn't around any parents, but I had parents in my head. I actually had myself as a brother watching my other kids, my younger brothers play U sports. I had my parents in mind. I was intrigued by your comments about how when you have spoken to former pro athletes, Jeff Francoer being one, but others, many others, and how they talk about they have already lived that ultimate dream versus the other side of the parents who uh didn't make it to that level of which they want or think their child can make it to two different extremes, right? Both ends of the spectrum. Can you talk about that a little more? I think it needs to be talked about uh more, especially with parents who want more for their kids than what the kid wants and can achieve.

SPEAKER_02 9:28

Yeah. Well, I mean, it's kind of cliche today to talk about, you know, the parent that's living vicariously through their kid in in sports, but but it's real. I mean, you guys see it, uh, I'm sure. Uh, so I I think you've got, you know, you've got maybe three types of parents uh who are who are parenting their their youth sports or young athletes. But one, you've got those who who are maybe four types, because you mentioned that pro athletes like Francoor, we interviewed Del Curry. Uh, and and Del's kind of like, man, I'd already lived that. I'd already lived that dream. I didn't need to relive it. You know, I just wanted, I just wanted whatever my kids did. And and there are a lot of pro athletes that we've talked to that that have that same feeling. I I don't, you know, Fran Coor's like, I don't need my kid to be a a star baseball player. I've been been there, done that. I I'm not trying to fill any hole. Uh so that's kind of nice for that type of parent. Then, you know, there are those parents that are that are, you know, that are trying to fill that hole. And and you can see it. I mean, it's pretty obvious to see. But but beyond that, I think they're also parents that that want what their kids want, but they just get so emotionally involved in it, and they want it for their kids, but they want it almost as badly as their kids do. And it ends up, they just put they put so much pressure uh on their kids. And um, and a lot of them, you know, a lot of them know the sport their kid is in. And so, you know, that that can be problematic too, how how well you know the sport. It can be an advantage for your kid for a parent to to be able to help a lot, but it also can be something that you're just constantly talking about the sport and giving them tips and giving them coaching on the side.

SPEAKER_03 11:22

And uh, I think you're stepping on my toes here.

SPEAKER_02 11:25

Well, yeah, that's the same way in tennis. Yeah. Uh, and you know, and and the kid doesn't know who the coach is and who the parent is, and and that's not a good thing. So uh, and then and then the fourth type of parent, I think, is the one who you know, who is just is just there for their kid to to enjoy and to do the best they can do, and they don't necessarily know that much about a sport, and they're just supportive. And uh and and I think those middle two parents are the ones that we all really want to kind of be if we're not pro-athletes. Uh and and the and the and the one that gets super emotionally involved, we want to we want to pull off the gas a little bit, but uh, but it but it's okay to be passionate about what your kid's doing. Uh, I certainly was passionate about it, and and and because of that, sometimes I did the wrong things and would have to check myself or my wife would have to check check me and she did. And uh, you know, I might have to apologize to my kids or whatever, but but I think you know, those are the two types of parents we want to strive to be.

SPEAKER_01 12:31

Brett, you you obviously love the the life of being a parent to athletes, uh, but hindsight's 2020. We all know that. Uh we know more now than we did then. And uh maybe some lessons that you guys have learned, both from your personal experience and from the podcast, you know, being a parent of athletes, we're too close. And sometimes we don't see that we're out of line. Our expectations may be higher than they should be. You know, you touched on it just a second ago, and it's something that you y'all have talked uh a little bit uh on the podcast. You don't know what your kid's gonna be, right? You you know, when they're coming up, you may think that they could be talented, but uh I played with kids that peaked at 10, right? And and that was it. Um maybe maybe talk about those lessons that you you've learned uh in the process of interviewing people, but being a parent yourself.

SPEAKER_02 13:21

Yeah, man, I've I've learned so much. And uh I I learned a lot as a result of the journey that I wish I knew at the beginning. But even in the past year and a half doing this podcast and listening, I I've learned so much that I wish I could go back and apply. You know, if I could go back and do it all over again, one of the things, and it's a major theme for us, is um is to focus more on development uh at early ages than you know, than being on the best team and winning everything and all those types of things. And I think, and not to go off on too much of a tangent here, but I think I think our sports culture today in America is you know, kids are playing more and more games pre-puberty, uh, eight years old, nine years old, ten years old. They're playing more and more games, you know, five and six games on a weekend at a tournament, and less and less practice. And the European model is kind of completely opposite of that. Uh, they spend a lot of time, there's a lot of talk now about European basketball, and uh, they play a lot less games at younger ages and a lot more practice and a lot more development. And so I I think that's one thing that that I would I look back, I'd focus a little bit more at earlier ages on development and not worry so much about, oh, I got to get to three tournaments, and tennis is tennis is a bit unique, uh, but you gotta, you know, you got to play tournaments all these weekends all over the place. You no, you don't. And what your what your kid is ranked or rated or or whatever at 10, 11, 12 years old, it just doesn't matter. So I, you know, what nobody's nobody's looking at at the 12 year olds, or very few are looking at the 12-year-olds. Now, I I can hear right now there's parents saying, well, if if I want to get in the right club at 13, I've got to be at this level at 12 and so on and so forth. But you just said it. I mean, kids blossom at different ages. Uh, you don't really know what you have until after puberty. And uh, so if a kid's good enough, they're gonna emerge and they're gonna get to the right place. Uh, so so that's one thing. The the other thing, and I'll say this is a big thing uh that I would do different is take is take breaks. And again, this is this is becoming harder and harder. Uh, tennis has been a year-round sport for a long time, uh, but many, many other sports are now year-round. And uh, and we think, well, if I take you know, a month off, my kid's gonna fall behind. How do I do that? And it's hard to jump off the train that is rolling down the tracks really fast. But uh, but my my son who who decided as a you know, as going into his high school senior year, he still played high school his senior year, but he was kind of done. And and I, you know, was he burnout or not? It's debatable, depending on your definition of that. But I look back and say, I I wish I'd given my kids more breaks and and not just given them more breaks, but force them to take more breaks. Uh, I I told both of my boys at one one point six months or so ago, I talked to them about this whole thing with breaks and said, I wish I had made you take two months. And they were like, Oh, I wouldn't want it to take two months. But hey, I'm the parent. Maybe it would have been best for me to say, no, we're gonna take two months off and and let your hunger for this sport and your passion, if you have it, kind of rekindle. And um, and and you're not, you know, if you're good enough, you're you're still gonna be good enough a month or two down the road.

SPEAKER_01 17:00

Yeah, I agree with you. And I think that I've been victim of that as well, of letting letting my kid kind of drive it rather than me as the parent, because I want them to, you know, I still want them to have a love for the game. I still want them to be passionate about it. I still want them to have that want to. So the urge is, well, this is what they want to do. So this is what we do. And then you end up having no break, and then the kids either get hurt or burn out, like you said, or whatever. Um, I think that's uh that's tough. And to your point about the year-round stuff, the the and I don't have a problem saying this, the culture of club sports and club sports coaches and the pressure that they put on kids. I've seen it. I've seen it with my daughter, this idea that you can't do anything else, right? Like you can't play another sports, you can't do you know we need you here kind of thing. And if you're not, that could affect your playing time. It's so far removed from the interscholastic experience, right? That it it just it blows my mind um how they're able to do that. It is. Uh now obviously your kids played and they played at a high level. And and while we say winning isn't everything in education-based athletics, we know that talented players and driven coaches, they want to win, right? I mean, everybody everybody does. Um, and there is a championship at the end of the year, that's the that can be the goal, but at the end of the day, only one team is gonna win that, right? Um, so now being in the stage of life where you sit, what advice would you give ADs, coaches, leaders of these programs who are leading kids like yours, knowing that that ultimate goal is winning. Uh, but there's more important lessons to be learned through sports participation, correct?

SPEAKER_02 18:43

Yeah, well, look, we we are not um about, you know, it should just be fun and don't ever worry about winning. And we play, we play to win.

unknown 18:52

Right.

SPEAKER_02 18:53

Um, you know, Frank Coor, I'm sure, is gonna say that. Uh we know we talk about on the show all the time. If you're out there, let's try to win. And winning's fun. Uh, let's be honest. Uh, it's more fun than losing.

SPEAKER_01 19:05

I agree.

SPEAKER_02 19:06

It's it's the winning at all costs thing that it's the winning being the only thing. Uh, so you know, if you if you list your priorities of, you know, I I used to coach a bunch of teams uh at younger ages, and we'd always sit down with the parents and say, okay, here are the here are the five things that we want to do with your kids, you know, during this season. And and winning was always on the list, but we always put it at the bottom of the list, but but we tried hard to win, yeah. But development was important and fun was important, and you know, and enjoyment and all those things. So so anyway, I just I never want to uh lose an opportunity to say that it's nothing wrong to want to win. But that being said, I think you know, one of the primary messages that we have for for coaches was said really well by Jay Billis on our show, and Dabo Sweeney has been on our show and he's echoed the same thing. And that is, you know, Jay said Jay had a really bad high school experience, and uh, and because of a coach, because of the head coach, and and he had like he had like four or five guys on his team that ended up, you know, playing at the next level. And of course, Jay was Jay and he was played at Duke and was great, but he he said, you know, this the statistics don't lie. 90, you know, over 95% of kids are not gonna play at the next level. Um, and and less than that at division one, way less than that at division one. So that means that coach, for your team of high school kids, you know, if you got 10 kids on that team, then nine of them, this is their last experience playing organized sports. And are you gonna make that miserable for them because you want to get X number of wins? Or, you know, are you gonna invest in these kids and make this a great experience and seize that opportunity to make a to make an impact on these kids? So I I think you know, it's just there's a mindset change of realizing, you know, and look, so many coaches do it great. Uh, so I I don't want to paint with too broad a brush, but when it's just the winning isn't everything, and and these these coaches, they have such an opportunity to influence young lives, and so many of them seize that, but the ones that don't, man, you're you're missing the boat. It's so rewarding for us to talk to pro athletes, and in every episode, we say, Hey, tell us about a coach that made a difference in your life. And we hear these incredible stories, and this is what Dabo said. Dad Dabo said that he tells every one of his coaches at the beginning of the year, he said, I want you to think about when that kid is 35 years old and he gets asked, Tell me about a coach, you know. Are they going to talk about you? You know, and and what are you going to do that would cause them to maybe talk about you as somebody who impacted and influenced their life? And I just think that's really powerful.

SPEAKER_01 22:12

Yeah, I agree with you. I I would argue, and you can debate this, that coaches, especially high school coaches, they have kids in what is possibly the most influential moment of their entire lives, right? I mean, if they I don't care if they live to be 80 years old, that time that you get them from 14 to 18, who they become and and and the trajectory of their life after that is the the the power in that. I don't think that coaches fully understand and grasp that sometimes.

SPEAKER_02 22:44

No, I I you know, not only are they, if they do grasp it, not only are they imparting something to these kids that's great, but that comes back to them too. I mean, it makes their experience a whole lot richer than just, you know, I won 18 games or whatever.

SPEAKER_03 23:03

Yeah, I think that uh comment that Jay Billis made on your show. I actually at the time of this recording haven't gone back and listened to Jay Billis, but I listened to Marty Smith and then talking to Jeff Francour. We used that same quote about, hey, there's only 5% of the kids gonna get to play ever again. That quote and that comment it it has a lot of road to it. I'm just thinking about today as we record, we're gonna celebrate some college signees here at Pope High School, and I get to talk about the 5%, being part of the 5%. And it really is as I'm doing the math in my head, it really is five percent uh here at Pope. Uh so I think coaches, they have a challenge to all right, coach that 5% are gonna get another opportunity. But as you say, 95% of those kids in the dugout or sideline or wherever on the bench, they never get to do it again, and it's your responsibility to make it uh make it a great experience for them and to give them some inspiration through it. So capturing that quote from Jay Billis is his goal for sure.

SPEAKER_02 24:08

Um I you know, to to add to that, though all those other kids, you know, they may do something unbelievably impactful in life as well. Right. And it may not be on the playing field or the court or in the swimming pool or wherever, but what one of the things that we preach and what pure athlete is all about is the ROI on youth sports for 95% of kids is not only relational potentially with parent and kid, but it's also all these life lessons that translate to everything else they do in life. So, yeah, if you're only focused on the one or two kids that might play next level as a coach, well, you're missing out on the other, you know, the other 90-something percent of kids that may do something else next level that came as a result of what they learned and what they experienced in sports.

SPEAKER_03 25:05

Right. And for for us at the high school level, for our high school coaches, I mean, they can't give the kid a scholarship. You can help that kid develop, but that's the college coach's job. So if you chase that, my my very first uh coach I worked for, he told me that I was blown away. I was kind of appalled. He's like, it's not my job to get that kid a scholarship, it's my job to coach baseball at this high school. Yeah, and that goes back to that. I gotta, I'm supposed to be coaching all these kids, not just that one trying to get that one or two or three or five, whatever it is, scholarships. That's yeah, that's great. I mean, like I said, that comment, man, it goes, it, it, it encompasses a lot. It's really good. Um hey, so I want to kind of change gears here a little bit, just get your thoughts on um a book and a quote I heard recently. So, in an interview with John Gordon, uh Don Yeager, the author speaker, Don Yeager, very popular, eloquent speaker and writer. He was asked how he came to write Walter Payton's autobiography. It was kind of his first work, uh book. And now he's written like 37 books of different athletes and different things that are really good. But he was just an SI.com writer at the time when the great Peyton employed him in his last days to write that autobiography. I just finished reading it. It's a it's a little bit of a weird read because it was put together after the after his passing. So it's he he he had a challenge there. Uh Jaeger answered that question about how he came about doing that with this statement. He said, I'm not sure, but I think game attracts game. I'm not sure, but I think game attracts game. He wasn't being arrogant. I know it kind of sounds that way in the short. There was other context around the answer, which made it really good. We just don't have time to do the whole thing there. But you've been around high-performing athletes, business people, and elite leaders for your whole life or for a long time, right? Do you agree with that statement that game attracts game? And and why or why not?

SPEAKER_02 27:03

Yeah, well, uh peel that back a little bit for me. What what what he meant by that?

SPEAKER_03 27:09

Yeah, I think Walter Payton and as I read the book, I think Walter Payton uh put himself in position with great people, or right. He he he he he okay um he put himself around greatness even after he became after he retired, right? And somehow, some way, I don't know that Don Yeager even answered the question, how Walter Payton found him, but Walter Payton saw greatness as a writer in Don Yeager, and I think that has played out since 1999 when he wrote the book.

SPEAKER_02 27:40

Yeah, I I mean I think that that's where I thought you were going with that. And I I mean, I definitely think that's true in all facets of life. One of the best things we can tell our kids, and and I'll talk off the sports field, but I do think it applies to sports as well, is uh find some people that have achieved what you're looking to do and and get close to them and watch them and observe them and see what it takes and and follow those things. So I I think you know that's true in in all of life. Uh we just had Paul Rabel, uh, we interviewed, who's in a kind of the Michael Jordan of of lacrosse, and uh he is retired now and he started the PLL. And oh my gosh, he's so dynamic. And uh, and I'll do a plug for he's got a book coming out in two weeks that that I got an advanced copy of, and it is so great. But uh, but he talks he talks a good bit about that in his book, about you know, observing and getting around people that that you want to follow uh and that you're gonna learn from. And and I think that you know, in sports too, we we all and that kind of drives some of our behavior as parents. We we want our kids to be on better teams or playing better opponents because you know it makes you better uh to to be around people that that do it well. Uh so I I don't know if that's if that was Walter's point there, but that's kind of the way I was interpreting it.

SPEAKER_03 29:18

Yeah, that's good. That's good. I I think I think you're right on there, being around people who are better than you. We talk about if you're if you're the best person in the room, getting a better get in a different room, right? Same thing. Um, you see a lot going back to youth sports, you see a lot of parents who elevate their kid being the best team, best player on the team, right? And they talk about it and and for what it, you know, that could be good or whatever. But I think the kids who really develop over time probably are never the best team, best player on their team because their parents put them in challenging spots a little bit.

SPEAKER_02 29:50

Yeah, now I will tell you this. Let me give you the other side of that coin is we see we see a number of uh situations where parents are trying to get their kids on the best team, and what ends up happening is they don't play that much. Okay, and from a development standpoint, that doesn't do them any good.

unknown 30:08

Right.

SPEAKER_02 30:08

So, yeah, it's great to say, well, I'm on such and such team. Uh let's just call I'm on team elite, and uh, and that sounds good to say, but is your kid what how's how are they benefiting from that? Are they are they really getting better uh as a result? I I would advocate, and we've had a number of of pro athletes advocate that I'd rather be on a team where I get to you know make a difference and I get to develop my skills at younger ages uh than necessarily be on the elite team.

SPEAKER_01 30:42

Yeah, that's a good point. I've lived that my daughter, she got asked to be uh essentially depth on on a higher level team. And and we've we turned it down because I wanted her, I wanted her to play. I wanted her to play, you know, consistently and and get reps that that was more important to us and to her than it was just to say that we were on yeah, you know, the team or whatever. I you can say you're on the team, but if you don't do anything and you're not getting any better, it's really kind of just a waste of time, you know.

SPEAKER_02 31:13

So well, guys, you you gotta see this in high school sports all the time because you know, kids more today than ever before are are jumping from program to program looking for the perfect spot for them. Uh, we we had you know, one of our early shows, we had Matt Stenchcombe, you know, UGA, all American linemen. Uh, he played at Parkview, the same school that that Jeff went to. But Matt Matt went to Parkview when Parkview was nothing, and they were getting clobbered all the time. And he was part of the group that rose Parkview to being, you know, when Fran Coor got there, like six or seven years later, you know, they were state champion type of teams. Well, Matt talks about I could have I could have left and gone to another school, and in today's environment, he would have been pressured to do that.

SPEAKER_01 32:08

Yeah, sure.

SPEAKER_02 32:09

He said, I I got to be part of building something. And uh, and we grew this thing and developed this thing and and had a brotherhood that was an experience that he he wouldn't trade for anything now. So I think again, you know, you you chasing, you know, chasing things and jumping all around isn't isn't there's a lot of a lot of parts of that that aren't positive for kids.

SPEAKER_03 32:34

Yeah, I agree. I think we see it a lot too in the varsity versus JV level or slash ninth grade level, where a coach makes a decision to make a kid a swing player, put them on JV, even though they may be a senior, I mean, uh scooping a sophomore, you know, and parents think it's time for my kid to be there, or maybe it's uh even a pretty good freshman. Uh parents think they need they they gotta be on varsity because they're chasing the scholarship, but the coach sees that hey, you need to get get reps. We want you to get reps, and we see that conflict and debate sometimes there. But hey, uh yeah, I live through that part view building. Oh, okay. I competed against them in 95 and 96. Um my sophomore and junior years in high school, and I think I'm around the same age as Matt Stenchcomb. So those guys were all I didn't play football, but I played baseball against some of his peers that uh I believe they won it in '96, was their first one. And uh Jeff came along a few years later and they just took it to another level and even have taken it even higher in baseball since then. Um speaking of Matt Stenchcomb and books, we talked about your book. That our next question, you teed it up perfect. Uh, you you wrote the book Parenting the Pure Athlete. Matt Stenchcomb wrote the forward for you. And in that forward, he talks about or he mentioned the book provides the appropriate lens to parent young your young athletes. Talk about your book for a minute, and what lens exactly were you hoping to provide parents who read the book?

SPEAKER_02 34:07

Yeah. I I think I yeah, I'll answer that two-part question. The the first I wrote the book during the pandemic year. There was no real, you know, it wasn't something I planned to do for any length of time, but I had time on my hands. I my journey was pretty much. I mean, my boys were going to be seniors. Well, actually, they were juniors in high school that year, about to be seniors, so they weren't quite finished. But, you know, we all had a lot of time on our hands, and I I spent a lot of time reflecting on the journey and and all the challenges and all the things that I had experienced and learned as a parent. And look, I I will say this, I I think I did that journey okay. I mean, I I I did it pretty well, uh, but I made a lot of mistakes and a lot of things that you know I wished I could do different. And as I started thinking about it, I started thinking, I'm I'm gonna write this stuff down. And I I simply came up with, I don't know, 30-something topics or areas that that I thought were very relevant to other parents, uh, and trying to and trying to parent in a way that what comes out on the other end is what you want to come out on the other end. And um, and so that was the lens I wrote it through is when you're finished with this journey, you know, what do you want to have happened? And what do you want the result to be? Uh, because again, I mean, all of us, all of us would love to like Jeff Rancour, you know, have our kids sign a $2 million contract or Jackson Holiday. In today's days, Jackson Holiday signed a $9 million contract. All that, all of us would like that to be the ROI on the journey. It's not for you, you know, 99% of kids. So, so, and even a college scholarship, you guys know, I mean, those are becoming harder and harder to get. And uh, and many sports don't it's don't give a lot of scholarships. So, if you're looking for an a financial ROI, there's not one for most of us. Uh, so so there better be something that you have, you know, in mind. And um, and so that was the lens that I I wrote it through was wanting to wanting to challenge parents to think about what they wanted and and how do you do this in such a way that when you're done with it, you're happy with the return you got on the all the time and money uh that was invested in thing. Again, I came up with like 30 topics. The pages, the chapters are two or three pages, they're easy reads. I don't have all the answers, never pretended to. In some cases, they're not black and white answers. There's just things to think about and to consider and make decisions about as parents, but but that's what I wanted it to be. Something, something that I wished I had had when I started my journey that made me go, oh, I hadn't thought about that. I need to think about that. Uh, and that's kind of what the book is.

SPEAKER_01 37:13

Now, let's kind of lean into that for just a second. Let's talk about sportsmanship. So I know that Jeff talked on one episode, that fine line between athletes having fun through celebrations and then being disrespectful uh to their opponents. And I tell you, as an AD in today's world, uh I really cringe when I notice that a lot of times the adults on the side of the celebrating athlete, they really egg that behavior on. I mean, you know, like they're they're part of it. And I'm not trying to tell a kid not to be passionate and not to have a release when they accomplish something, but there is kind of an unwritten rule about not showing up your opponent. Maybe take a minute to uh college baseball, I think, is the worst right now. I think that it's it is really a thing for them that they need to take a look at. But take a minute and talk about what you think is the parents' role in teaching proper sportsmanship and behavior to their athletic child. Is it the parents' responsibility or does it just fall solely on the coaches and and and the schools?

SPEAKER_02 38:13

I think it's the parents, 100% the parents. Uh now, do the coaches have major influence on that? Yes. And and because we have so many parents who don't embrace that as their role, then the only the the next line of defense is the coaches. But we we had a whole episode on sportsmanship. I also write about it in my book, and and we say very strongly, this is the parents' role, uh, to to teach kids, you know, how do you win with grace, how do you lose with grace. And at the crux of sportsmanship, you said it right. It it's about you know showing respect to your opponents. It's not, I mean, it doesn't mean you can't celebrate, and where that line is is fuzzy and it's it's gray. I'll give you that. I mean, Jeff, I'm sure will talk about even in baseball, you know, what 10 years ago was considered showing up your parent, your parents, showing up your opponents is not considered that today, and so I, you know, I I get all that, but there's too many people who they're not skirting up to the line, they're taking broad leaps over the line, and they see it on Sports Center uh clips on Instagram. I mean, the thing that drives us crazy is it's not enough to win anymore. Uh, it's not enough to dunk. You've got to then stand over the person you dunked on and and taunt them. You've got to you've just got to do things to stick it back in their face and say, not only not did I just make a great play, but I annihilated you. And that's disrespecting your opponent. And I mean, I I think parents, it starts at a very young age talking about what's right and what's wrong and the way that you the way you play the game. And uh, and and sometimes it's you sometimes you might have to yank your kid off the field. And we've asked many athletes, it were did your parent ever yank you off the field? And and almost every time, you know, if it happened, and Jeff is an example of it, it happened a couple of times to him, they'll say, I was the bet like the best thing my parent did. Now they didn't think that when it happened, but looking back, it was one of the best things their parent did to say, hey, dude, we're we don't act like that in this family. So yeah, I I I challenge and encourage parents. This is not just on the playing field, this is about an attitude of how you deal with other people that translates into all of life. And I think it's one of the things that you should take as serious as you take how good they're getting in their sport.

SPEAKER_01 40:57

You bring up an excellent point. That kid knows he got dunked on.

unknown 41:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:01

Like you don't have to tell him. Everybody in the arena saw what happened. Like, you don't have to let him know. Everybody saw it. You talk about pulling kids off the field. I had a conversation with my daughter. Let's just say uh recently in a tournament, she chose violence. Let's just say that, right? That it was a very physical game. They had you know battled back and forth with this kid, and she had kind of had enough and she kind of reacted. Uh, and after the game, I told her I was like, that's not happening again. I don't care if it's me physically removing you or whatever, but we're not gonna do that. Like it's it it is a you're playing a game and it's a physical game and you're going back and forth, but at the end of the day, we're not going to have unsportsman-like behavior. It's just not going to be tolerated. But I I love what you talked about, them showboating stuff. Like it man, that kid knows. Everybody knows, you know, like you don't it just it just does. Now, as we kind of wrap up here, maybe define the pure athlete. Like what does it look like? Uh, and and how does the podcast help to highlight those aspects of today's competitor?

SPEAKER_02 42:07

Well, let me start with why we chose the name pure athlete and and that brand. And uh the athlete part is obvious. The pure part, you know, when you think about the word pure, whether you apply it to water or to gold or to whatever, it just has this connotation of the best version of something. And uh, and so that's why, from a pure athlete standpoint, we we want to promote this idea of what you know, what's the best version of athlete and eventually of person that you can become? That's what pure athlete is about. We're we're trying to help parents and kids and coaches navigate this journey to help kids become the best versions of themselves on the field and off the field. We're not trying to back away. We we embrace kids that are going for it and and really want to be elite. Uh, you know, that that's great. Dream big, aspire to big things. How do you do that in the healthiest way, uh, both physically and emotionally and spiritually, and all those types of things? And so that's really what Pure Athlete is. We came up with five pillars, and the there's no magic to this, and and this is just things we observed that parents, in my experience, parents are spending so much time on skill development, and skill is one of the pillars we chose, but they spend kids are spending so much time developing skills and not thinking about the other things that that lead to achievement, and that by the way, translate into life. Uh, and and so the five pillars the first one was vision, and vision just has that idea of you know knowing what your where your destination is, where your desired destination is, and thinking about that above. Both long-term and in shorter terms, and setting goals and teaching your kids to set goals around hey, if you want to achieve this long-term goal, well, what's your goal for this week look like? What's your goal for this practice look like? Are you practicing with a purpose? So that's the whole idea of vision. The second one is grit. And we know that you know, talent, talent and skill by itself, skill doesn't happen without grit. I mean, talent, you know, there are a lot of talented kids that don't make it because they don't have grit. And you got to work hard for things. We define grit uh is is perseverance driven by passion. Uh, it's working through tough things, it's developing that toughness. Uh so you know, can that be developed or is it inherent? Uh, we we believe that, you know, there are kids, you know, Tim Tebowes is the poster child for six years old. He's doing a thousand sit-ups and a thousand push-ups. And we all we all want to have our kids read that book and say, why can't you be like, you know, this kid? Well, that you guys know that's that's a needle in a haystack. Uh, but grit we think can be developed. Uh and you can move, you you may not become Tim Tebow, but you can you can encourage and coach and and share with kids about the the results of of work ethic and so on and so forth. Yeah, I did that with my boys a lot. Uh and uh I won't go into the details of that, but the third one is skill, the fourth one is belief, and belief really is is a bucket for everything about the mental side of sports, and uh because it's a differentiate differentiator. And and we chose the word belief because everything that you do from a mental side it is really geared towards when I step on the field or I step to the free throw line or you know, in the batter's box or wherever do I believe. Because if you believe, your chances of success go up exponentially, and um, and so that whole idea, and and in some cases, that may mean you know, mental coaches, it may mean sports psychologists, it may mean a whole lot of different things, but those are being brought down into colleges and even high schools now, but they haven't been for that long. And so the earlier you can teach your kids about the right mental mindset, I might one of my sons had the most negative mental mindset you can have in sports, and and it was a challenge through his whole sports life. And I wish I had recognized it earlier, and there's some things that I would have addressed earlier to help him because it because it translates to life, but it made it hard to succeed when you can't let go of the negative, and then the last one is character. And look, you guys, we just talked a little bit about the sportsmanship side of character, but you can be a great athlete and have poor character. We see it all the time. But we we decided that to be a pure athlete, you are a person of character, and that that that goes into your ability to be a leader, your ability to be a great teammate, your ability to have great sportsmanship, uh, and and so many other aspects of that. So that's how we defined pure a pure athlete. Those are the uh the things that we're trying to speak into and trying to just encourage parents and kids to take a more holistic approach. It's not just about my swing speed, uh, it's not just about you know my handles and basketball. There's a whole bunch of other things that uh that are gonna lead to you achieving what you want to achieve. And those things, by the way, again, translate into life.

SPEAKER_03 47:50

Yeah, that's really good. Five great fundamentals for us to look at, and uh especially as parents to try to portray to our kids. I know every morning I say eight things or I have my son repeat eight things back to us. Um, and I know kids can remember. And I think those five words with your definitions are great things you could teach your young athlete if you're a parent or really even a high school coach, you could make those a part of your uh fundamental core values. So that's really good. Hey, Britt, before I last question, I wanted to ask you tell tell folks where they can get your book, remind them the name of it, and then the pure athlete platform where they can find you on that. If anything else you want to, any other way they can connect with you.

SPEAKER_02 48:30

Yeah, I appreciate that. Uh the book is on Amazon. It's called Parenting the Pure Athlete. So it's out there. It's just it's just in paperback. It's a pretty easy read. The show is called the Pure Athlete Podcast, and you can find it anywhere. You know, you listen to podcasts. We Pure Athlete Inc. Inc, Pure Athlete Inc is our website. It's our our Instagram. Uh I will tell you, you know, we our you we have a YouTube channel we're putting out a lot of content on. Our Instagram, we put a clip out every day from one of our podcasts that are meant to challenge and encourage and their different athletes and and so on and so forth. We're releasing an episode today with Heather Heather Mitz, uh, which who is a three-time gold medal soccer player. And uh, so she talks a lot about her soccer journey, and uh, and we've got some clips out. And one of one of them, I don't want to chase a rabbit trail, but one of them I think is pertinent uh to you guys. We ask her about this whole idea of club club sports folks telling kids they shouldn't play high school ball, uh, because it happens in a lot of in a lot of clubs and in a lot of different sports. And uh so she gives her thoughts on all that because she's a high school coach now as well. And uh, so that's that's pretty interesting. But anyway, that's where you find us. We appreciate we're getting a lot of support. A lot of parents, you know, DM us and send us in their situations and you know their stories, and we love hearing those things, and and and I really appreciate you guys giving me an opportunity to talk about USports today because we love it.

SPEAKER_03 50:13

Absolutely. Not only am I a big fan of the the podcast and the platform and everything you're doing, I like the color scheme too. So uh it works well with my palette here at Pope. That's awesome. Uh yeah, it's good. So I need to I need to uh figure out how to get one of those hoodies and add it to my hook yeah.

SPEAKER_02 50:28

We'll hook you up.

SPEAKER_03 50:29

Brent, last question before you get our two-minute drill, kind of a uh a short question, a statement. I'm gonna let you fill in the blanks. We're gonna have two blanks. You take it anywhere you want to take it. I'll read it a couple times and give you so give you a yeah, this is uh this is fun. We're doing it with everybody this year. So here we go. The best way to become better at blank is to become better at blank. The best way to become better at blank is to become better at blank.

SPEAKER_02 50:57

Gosh, that's a I can wow. I'm not the greatest at coming with up with things on the spot. The best the best way to become better I'm gonna say the best way to become better at parenting is to become better at observing and listening. And I mean that in the sense of being self-aware and being aware of where of where your kids are and being reflective about those things. I don't know. That's not that's not a great answer, but that's all I got.

SPEAKER_01 51:36

I would argue it's a I would argue it's a great answer.

SPEAKER_03 51:39

Yeah, I think it is. I I think I think the raw answer there is perfect. That's that's really good. Uh yeah, great. Brent, thanks a lot. Uh you got a you got a great expertise, and and I know you spent a lot of time and energy uh uh researching and and writing on and speaking of and speaking to people uh to help us be better in the space that we're at, youth athletics, whether it's education-based or recreational or anywhere in between. So thanks a lot. Great conversation today. Hey, we're gonna have a little fun now, get to know you a little bit more, uh, kind of uh take the edge off a little bit here with our two-minute drill. So I'll let Donnie start us.

SPEAKER_01 52:14

Okay, Britt, we're gonna get hit you with some rapid fire questions. We want you to just tell us the first thing that comes to your mind, okay?

SPEAKER_02 52:20

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 52:20

All right. What was the first job you ever had ever in your life? First job.

SPEAKER_02 52:26

Uh, you'll like this. I was the uh assistant gym manager at my high school, which basically meant I swept the floors, I took up tickets, I did all that kind of stuff, but I was at every high school sporting event that that I wasn't playing.

SPEAKER_01 52:41

First of all, cool jobs. Second of all, I could really use some of those. That's that's a really good one. Not going back.

SPEAKER_03 52:47

Sounds like an assistant AD. If you want to move over here, I'll use it. Yeah, that's good. I'll pay you about as much as you got paid then, probably. That's good. All right, what was your favorite age growing up?

SPEAKER_02 52:59

My favorite age growing up was uh I would say uh I would say 16. Uh, you know, got got my driver's license. Uh in addition to that, my my my parents, we had a we had a boat up at the lake, and at 16, they'd let me go up there by myself uh or take friends up there. And uh and you know, I had a great high school experience, just a great high school experience. So so uh I look back on those years fondly.

SPEAKER_01 53:32

Yeah, I I totally agree with you. Uh let's play a little game of this or that. So we're gonna give you two things. You say this or that. Better MM song. Lose yourself or losing it.

SPEAKER_04 53:44

You guys do listen to the podcast.

SPEAKER_02 53:49

Oh, I I guess I'll go with the only one that truly is an MM song, which is yourself.

SPEAKER_01 53:57

That was that was so good. I the the me and my daughter, we have a playlist thing too, and so I resonated with it, you know, to begin with. And for those of you that don't know, you just gonna have to just watch the episode uh of the podcast, but it was great.

SPEAKER_02 54:11

Hey, you know, I have to tell you, one of the reasons I was a couple minutes late getting on is my my daughter from uh who lives in Michigan right now called me this morning and she was in the car and she was listening to that podcast and she was hammering me on that.

SPEAKER_01 54:28

So good.

SPEAKER_03 54:29

The joke is here, Brett, I'm right there with you because I'm not the I like music, but I don't I can't re-egitate it. So hey, I'd have been I'd I'd be answering the same way. Yeah. All right, another this or that. Spelling bee or math bee?

SPEAKER_02 54:44

Uh that's funny one because I actually was a really good speller. Um so I'll go with Spelling B, even though I went to Georgia Tech. Uh so I was a I was a little bit of a math guy, but I don't I didn't love math. I I was a business major there, not an engineer.

SPEAKER_01 55:01

All right, so this or that audiobook or a physical book?

SPEAKER_03 55:04

Physical book.

SPEAKER_01 55:06

I agree.

SPEAKER_03 55:07

I think the bookshelf proves that too. All right, last this or that question gas station or rest area?

SPEAKER_02 55:14

Oh, gas station.

SPEAKER_01 55:17

As a as a youth sport parent on those on those road trips, nothing better than a good gas station.

SPEAKER_02 55:22

Yeah, yeah. You got you gotta get you gotta go in and get something.

SPEAKER_01 55:26

All right, best sports memory you have of your kids playing athletics?

SPEAKER_02 55:31

Uh it's uh my my son's won three state championships in tennis, and so that was really fun. The mo the best memory, and and those, you know, again, their coaches told them that was meaningless. You know, that they were they were hurting their tennis by playing high school. Uh, and it was their most fun in front of their tennis. On pandemic year, we went to Orlando to play a high school tournament, uh, the whole team did. And literally GHA G GHSA here shut down the week we got back, and it was pandemic year, and we won that tournament in Orlando, and it and so that was our whole year of tennis. We didn't get to have the season right uh that year, and uh, and it was that trip was just a great memory, uh, I think because of the context and everything.

SPEAKER_03 56:29

Good. All right, sort of some uh a serious two-minute drill question here. What is the key to ensuring that our kids have the best youth sports experience possible?

SPEAKER_02 56:40

I think it's the parents. I I think I don't care what how good you are, how good your team is, uh if your parent, if the parent acts the wrong way, it ruins the sports experience. And if the parent acts the right way, you can be on a losing team and still have great camaraderie, you can still have great memories, great experiences. But that's why I think there's so much on the parents. And the coaches have a huge role in that too. Look, I had a football coach in sixth grade, and and I didn't I never played football again. Uh so it taught me really early how miserable a coach can make an experience. But but parents and and I I I don't want to go off too far here, but I have a chapter in the book called The Car Ride Home, and it's the chapter that almost everybody talks to me about. And the car ride home by itself is it and it hits all of us right between the eyes. Um is is a place that where your kid is most vulnerable. And it's usually the place where we want to launch into what they did wrong and what they could have done better and all those kind of things. Just save it.

SPEAKER_01 57:55

Totally agree. All right, if there was a draft for your favorite candy bar, what would be your number one draft pick?

SPEAKER_02 58:02

Uh payday. Oh. Isn't that weird?

SPEAKER_03 58:06

Oh, okay. Good one.

SPEAKER_02 58:08

That's a good one. Yeah, that's good.

SPEAKER_03 58:10

Okay, let's finish with it. Well, let's say you can hang out with anyone, who would that be and why?

SPEAKER_02 58:19

Alive, dead, anybody?

SPEAKER_01 58:21

Anybody?

SPEAKER_02 58:23

Anybody. Well, I'll just I'll stick with alive. I mean, from a, you know, I'm I'm a I'm a Christian, so it would be easy to say Jesus uh or Paul. Uh, but I I'll stick with alive and I'll go away from all of that. And I'll say uh I I would love to go have dinner with Roger Federer.

SPEAKER_01 58:45

Okay. Brett, thank you so much for the time today. Uh continued success with the podcast uh and then and with the book as well. You've helped us and our listeners get better today, and for that, we are very grateful. So thanks again.

SPEAKER_02 58:57

Hey, thanks for having me, guys, and thanks for what you guys do. You know, you're on the front lines and tried to create great experiences for for kids and for family. So, you know, thanks for what you do.

SPEAKER_03 59:10

Well, it was an honor to have Britt Lee join us today. Britt is co-founder of the Pure Athlete podcast platform there, Pure Athlete. He wrote a book, Parenting the Pure Athletes. If you're looking for a good book to go grab, uh I'm looking forward to reading that as I parent a young, um, a young athlete as well. But I thought Britt's take on youth sports and his research and the conversations he's had with uh some big names in the world of athletics that observe youth sports from a different perspective. Uh Britt really gave us a good take on how we should act as a leader in youth sports. So whether we're a parent, a coach, an athletic administrator, I think he gave us some good takeaways there. Uh and he also helped us understand as an athletic director how we can better help our parents navigate the world of youth sports because there's so many traps there for them. There's so many misunderstood um ideas, misunderstood comments. There's there's quite frankly false information being promoted by some people in some seriously uh impactful positions. And as high school athletic administrators, collegiate athletic administrators, leaders in athletics, we should be uh aware of how we can promote the right message that is youth sports, including high school athletics that we primarily are involved with. I think most of you listening are probably in the same category that Don and I are as well there. So this is a two-part series on youth sports. Today you heard from Brett Lee. Uh they in this Pure Athlete podcast, if you haven't listened to it, Brett co-hosted it with Brad Williams, and also a name that may be a little more familiar is uh Jeff Francour. So Brad Williams is the athletic director at Providence Christian Academy in Lawrenceville, Georgia. And then Jeff Francour is a um former high school star athlete in Georgia, went on to play professional baseball for several MLB teams. Next week or in two weeks, our next episode that will release will be our conversation with Jeff Francour. So we will continue this conversation across uh the whole month here, uh, and we hope that you'll be able to connect our conversation today with Britt Lee with Jeff Francour's conversation. We're not going to talk much about the Braves or Royals or uh what an MLB player is. We're gonna continue to talk about youth sports and athletic administrators. I think this is a good way for us to focus on how we can better serve our community. So uh come back and listen to Jeff Francour, go back and listen to Britt Lee and take some more notes. I know that'd be great. Hey, we'd love to know what you think of this uh this conversation on youth sports. So leave us a message or a rating, a review on the plat uh podcast platform you're listening to. Send us a message on X or Instagram at hanging with the AD. If you found us on the podcast, you can find us on social media. We really, really appreciate the ones who uh of you who send us a message. And as always, we thank you for spending your time hanging with the ADs.